In recent weeks I have been busy knitting ‘Jolly Santa Hats’ discussing what colour they should be knitted in, and the role that global corporations have played in this particular aesthetic.
Today’s conversation/argument was deflected by suggestions for Christmas lists and much time was spent looking for the Argos catalogue.
Failure to find it (it had been ‘recycled’ several months earlier) meant a reliance on memory and as I sat knitting and listening to excited shouts of ‘MP3 player!’ and ‘laptop!’ I had a disturbing flashback to the 1970’s ‘Generation Game’ and couldn’t resist calling out ‘don’t forget the cuddly toy!’ which was met with looks of derision and contempt.
A rare and touching moment of sibling intimacy was observed as the little children discussed whether a Kindle Fire was the equivalent to two or three DS games – and whether an iPod is technically classed as a stocking filler as it’s really small.
I mentioned how ironic it was that St Nicholas is the Patron Saint of pawn brokers, and that he has a mate called Krampus who scares naughty children with his big rusty chains, and another mate called Black Peter who carries a cane for punishing bad children, and by the way, did you know that greed is one of the seven deadly sins?
More looks of contempt and much rubbing out and re-writing of lists.
They got up, and as they left the room passed me their lists. On each one was scrawled “Dear Santa, I actuly dont care what I get as long as its not nitted”
The vintage knitted rabbit, and retro lion, are lying together in an intimate embrace in a blue suitcase in my studio; cuddly relics from Christmas’s past, destined to remain, forever, on the consumerist conveyor belt of rejection.