Having lost my ‘to do’ list, I spent a very pleasant, and rare, few minutes today flicking through a glossy fashion magazine and listening to the radio. I was looking for key trends in an attempt to keep my finger on the pulse of the movers and shakers in the fashion world in light of The Mercerie’s inclusion in Norwich Fashion Week this spring.
I was slightly distracted from my ‘research’ by a discussion on the radio about the importance of daydreaming on ones intellect and creativity, and this was all the justification I needed to wander off into that place where the real and the imaginary collide.
Distracted now, I found myself gazing down at a page of exquisite feathered costumes; it seems feathers are still in the spotlight for spring 2013.
Beautiful, fluffy coats of down, in brilliant electric blue, glided down the runway on 6 inch heels and Anna Dello Russo, internationally acclaimed fashionista, was sitting in the front row enthusiastically clapping, then standing and congratulating me, extolling the sheer brilliance of this feathery debut collection. We stood chatting for some time about the ostentation of feathered haut couture and whether the analysis of fossilised bird bones really does reveal that our Neanderthal cousins adorned their bodies with vulture and jackdaw plumage.
In mid conversation I suddenly remembered I was supposed to be cleaning out the chickens, as they hadn’t been done since before Christmas, so I made my excuses and left.
The hen house was lined with a thick carpet of chicken poo. It is important that this is scraped out very quickly, whilst holding your breath and trying not to breath. Any intake of breath, when your head is inside the hen house results in instantaneous gagging and retching. I warned the chickens that if they hadn’t started laying again by next week, they’d end up either on the catwalk or in the oven, then attempted to distract my senses by returning to the glittering daydream.
I approached Dello Russo again to ask her opinion of Silkies;
“…..you know, those hilarious comedy chickens with the fluffy feet – they’d make a nice coat”
I watched with horror as her eyes glazed over, her face fell and she inched away from me. I detected a hint of the ‘eau de poultry’ scent I was wearing, then looked down and caught sight of my pink supermarket wellies covered in compost, and my yellow marigold gloves with little clumps of chicken poo and straw stuck to them.
This was clearly an unforgivable, and extremely rude, fashion statement, and one I shall not be repeating.
The Mercerie’s debut knitwear collection can be seen at The New Designers Show at Epic Studios, Norwich on March 17th.
There will be no feathers